Let’s face it, living without money is hard. Ideally, we could all just go through life being nice, and things would work out. However, after living on this planet for about two seconds, I realized that this will never happen. So I studied a subject I liked, then went out and landed a job that seemed fitting. What could go wrong, right? Well, I seem to have gotten a little case of “Keeping up with the Joneses”…that’s what went wrong.

If you’re unfamiliar with that term, it basically means that you compare yourself to your neighbors (and friends), and what they have. If they have more, you feel inferior, and want what they have. I’m not even materialistic. I don’t even crave high end goods. Yet somehow, my mind has still fallen into the trap of directly comparing myself with others, and feeling bad about it. Yeah, I have a job that I (occasionally) enjoy, and it pays my bills. The only problem is that (a) stuff (houses, food, air) in the NY/NJ area is really expensive, and (b) most of my friends make at least twice, and some even four times as much as I do. So I’ve made a decision, I’m not going to let my income determine the outcome of my life.

If all I did was stick to the stats, I would never win. Someone always has more. The only way to be truly happy in life is to appreciate what you have, make the best of it, and not worry about the other guy. I’m not saying that it’s an easy thing to do. Some of us just got wired to look left and right with jealousy. The key is to really think about it, and become aware of the situation. Also, take a look around, and you’ll find people with a lot less than you who are leading fulfilling lives. If they can do it, why can’t we?

Some things would need to change obviously. Financial responsibility most definitely has to be a part of this equation. Chances are, if you’re working in some sort of desk job like me, the money isn’t flying at you, so you need to be smart about how it gets used. Do you really need an iPhone? The cheapest option is still $70 a month. I use my ‘normal’ cell phone and pay $30 instead. So over the course of the year, I save $480! Do you really need to hit up Starbucks every day? Even if your drink is only $2.50 a day, over the course of the month that $50, over the course of the year that $600! Combine that with the cellphone, and I just saved $1080 over the course of a year. If this is part of my normal lifestyle, over 5 years, that’s $5,400. So from day 1, if I was putting that money aside for some average investments getting an 8% return per year, I would have $6,842.80 at the end of year 5. All from just staying away from the fancy phone, and not buying individual cups of coffee (I make my own).

So with this two pronged approach, I plan to get through life with a good level of happiness. I will recognize that material things aren’t that important, and it doesn’t matter what my friends have. We’re different people, and should lead different lives. If they have excess money to spend, that doesn’t mean I do, so why should I compare at all? We don’t even have the same kind of job. Then to make the most of what I do have, I stop the financial bleeding where I can, such as the tiny changes mentioned above. If you sit down and analyze your monthly spending, I’m sure you’ll find some as well. Using a tool such as Mint.com can also help you track your spending, and set goals. Remember, small things add up to big savings!

Now get back to work, and quit looking at your neighbors stuff! None of it matters in the big scheme of life.

The dreaded work commute, is there anything worse? Whether or not you actually like your job, commuting is rarely spoken of with kind words. Some people have to deal with an hour of car traffic, while others have to cram onto a subway train with the masses. Every once in a while, a new report comes along with data indicating that people are working from, a.k.a. “telecommuting” at higher and higher rates every year. Well, until we reach a time when that is the norm, we all have to deal with commuting. So in the meantime, did you ever stop to consider the upside to it all?

You know it’s coming, so just accept it and relax

You wake up, get ready, and head into work. However you do it, it’s your routine. There really isn’t that much that differs from day to day for most of us. You’ve been doing this for a while, you know how it works, and accepting it all is the key to being able to relax.

If you drive to work, I’m sure you take the same route or two every day. You know about the traffic mess, you know about the potholes. This isn’t a surprise, so just take it all in stride. There’s no need to stress out, and add to the road rage, honking your horn, driving aggressively etc. Since you already know what’s coming, just turn on some music, and use it as some quality time. When else during your week will you have a solid hour to just sit there and listen to music, or a good podcast? Make use of this time for some enjoyment, instead of just wasting it by raising your blood pressure and getting angry at the world.

Go with the flow, don’t fight it

If you’re a mass transit commuter, you have to deal with an entirely different set of commuting challenges. Yes, schedule changes, bad weather, and breakdowns are definitely a headache, and there’s not much you can do about them. However, if you step out the door each day ready to just go along for the ride, and don’t worry about everything being ideal, it helps.

Into music, then bring along your iPod and just zone out. Actually enjoy it, instead of having it as a soundtrack to your stress. Put on something relaxing to help set the tone. Bring along a book or a magazine, and think of delays as a bonus to get to the next chapter. I promise you, if you’re in the middle of reading something you really enjoy, you’ll actually be happy if you miss your train, and have some extra time to kill.

What if you don’t have anything to read, or listen to? Not a problem, time to get creative. I’m a firm believer that “people watching” should be a sport. I’m not talking about stalking the cute girl on her way to work, I’m talking about noticing people, and all of their differences and peculiarities. Imagine who they are, where they’re coming from, what makes them so interesting/weird/angry/happy. You can make a little story up. It definitely beats staring at a poster, or down an empty subway tunnel.

Remember, whatever you do to pass the commute, this is totally free time where you don’t have to think, or be responsible for anything, other than keeping your car in a straight line, or walking along with the crowd into an open door. Let your autopilot take care of the routine, and use that free time for a little fun!

Now get to work in a good mood, or at least a neutral one.